Photojournalism: Freshmen continue to be welcomed after 9 months of school

That's long enough for a full pregnancy!

Conspiracy attacks the whiteboard

Breaking news:
Lancer Express Editor-in-Chief Hannah Nichols reportedly wrote an inappropriate message on the white-board next to the south door of the Lancer Express newsroom. The message included the words: "ASSES on the fló"
The message, believed to be a secret code, indicated that a possible conspiracy theory might be taking over CHS. MidKnight Train interviewed a member of Lancer Express about the development.
"I just don't know what to think!" Sophomore Alex Gnibus said. "Hannah never says or does anything inappropriate! Someone is totally out to get her."
Many people are believed to be out to attack Nichols and this "framing" does not follow Nichols normal mode of operation. Though Gnibus was confused at the supposed actions of Nichols, Lancer Express staff writer John Muoio wasn't as skeptical.
"I don't know, Hannah can get preeeeeeeeeetty shifty sometimes," Muoio said. "You just can't trust someone who never lies!"
Nevertheless, whether Ms. Nichols posted this message or not, it is a direct affront to her career and authority. Should anyone know any information confirming Ms. Nichols involvement or the involvement of another student, the information should be brought forward immediately.

Gopher Sightings

Ninja Jedi

 
Last week, for the first time in an unknown period of time, a gopher peeked his little head out of the ground around the 200 buildings. This gopher sighting was witnessed by no other than senior Joseph Clark.

“I was so excited to see a groundhog,” Clark says, reminiscing of his encounter with the deadly creature. “Upon closer examination, I realized this was no groundhog at all! It was a gopher!”
Gopher’s have been tricking people for centuries by luring people close to them, and then attacking them when they’re overwhelmed with the creatures cuteness. It is advised that if one SEES a gopher (or gopher they think is a groundhog), you run away screaming at the top of your lungs for assistance. Fortunately, this is the exact action that Clark took when pitted against his adversary.
“Luckily Shinne’s class was the closest classroom to my debacle,” Clark said. “Shinne then preceded to walk out of his room in a superhero like fashion and